Blurry

Everything's been very blurry recently. 

Names and faces and people and places have swirled together into a mass of fast paced wildness that is messing with my head. 

I don't know where this has come from, and I don't know when it will leave, but the one thing I do know is that I'm starting to doubt myself again and that's the last thing I want to do.

I want to be calm and collected and coherent, and right now I'm not.

I don't want to slip into any weird funk or confused daze, I'm not even 100% sure why I'm writing this down.

I hope this helps. 

I hope it goes away.

An Open Letter To Him

When I saw you today something changed.

You sat across the room from me, completely oblivious and absorbed in your own little world. You smiled to yourself and laughed quietly. You were afraid that someone saw you when you looked both ways and turned crimson, shying away from your own happiness. But I saw.

You didn't see me as I looked to you, as I smiled along with you. You didn't notice as the sun glanced through the window and landed on you, making you shine. You didn't notice you were not alone. But I did.

You don't realise that when I smile at you, I want you to do more than smile back on instinct. You don't understand that I like you more and more each time I see you. You don't even know my name. But I know.

You don't see me as anything more than a girl in the year below. You don't believe that you could create such an lingering sensation without even a touch. You don't know me.

But I'd like you to.